Caché
Written by Action Andy on January 27, 2010Caché is a 2005 French film by Michael Haneke. It’s terrible.
I SHOULD stop there but in order to tell this small story a bit more information needs to be divulged, at least for anyone besides Brando, Scott, and myself to understand it.
Brando used to own this DVD (God willing he threw it out) and loaned it to Scott. During one gathering of the three of us Scott returned the DVD to Brando asking for his wasted hours back or something like that. I couldn’t believe Scott when he said it was the worst movie he had ever seen; however, I should have considering we share the same opinion on almost everything we see.
Regretfully, I then borrowed it from Brandon. A few days went by until, more regretfully even, I watched Caché. I can tell you Scott was right. I have never wanted my life back so hard as I have when remembering Caché. Then we continued to badger Brandon as to why he watched it in the first place, let alone owned it. I also questioned myself, particularly regarding the few instances in which I chose to ignore the nagging voice in my head telling me to turn it off.
So there you have it. Scott and I both loathe Caché.
Now you’ll understand the following story. It begins with Brandon texting me at work last week.
Brandon: “Scorsese has optioned Caché for an American remake. Bahahahahahaha. I love my life.”
Andy: “Wow. I hate life. Let me guess…starring Leonardo DiCaprio?”
B: “Lol…probably”
A: “Ugh. Way to ruin my day.”
————tens of minutes go by————–
B: “Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha…just read an article that says Leonardo DiCaprio is already attached to play George (the father).”
A: “Hahaha. I’m amazing. They are F*$&ing gay for eachother.”
A: “Does Scott know yet? Cause we may want to put him on suicide watch.”
B: All the texts a[bout] Caché have been between you and Scott 
”
A: Haha
—————————————–
Andy: “After all this Caché talk, I warned Brando we may have to put you on suicide watch.”
A: “I think we should see it together and sneak beers into the theatre.”
Scott: “Haha! Stupid Caché.”
A: “Hah”
S: “Not enough beer in the world.”
The sad part about this short story is it contains more drama and character than Caché does. It’s also exponentially more rewarding.
